So, yes ...

An awkward pause while I contemplate you, the screen and the keyboard. I'll survey my fingernails and you'll glance out of the window. I'll hummmm and you'll hmmph, and we'll both look at everything but each other because it's been awhile since we last spoken. It's been awhile since we both shared, anything.

So, what shall I tell you that would be an interest to you? I've experienced a great deal in these past 6 months of sporadic contact. I've glossed over some, mentioned others, and left a great deal unsaid - mainly because I never seem to have enough time to fit you in and have a good, solid gabfest. That I never seem to have enough time to see you seems to me, to be a handy excuse. It may be to you too. But I shouldn't apologise for it, and I will not.

You are not quite the confidante that you were before. I am realising that I have perhaps, outgrown your use, but I still crave the discipline of crafting a piece of me for us to share. So, your role is changing, and has changed in tandem with my changes. But you still have some part, yet, to play in my life. I don't know what or how, just yet.

So, I'll make you no promises, and you'll not have great expectations of me. Agreed?

I'll tell you a little about what's been happening before I go.

Ever since I came off my internship, my time and efforts have been divided between completing course requirements, working two jobs, hanging out with friends, talking with Dad, contemplating life after uni, and being with P. I was in a small-ish prang some weeks ago, and a bunch of us went on a nightmare camping trip in the Grampians. My mother and I are not in accord at the moment but that'll sort itself out once I've climbed off the high rope of indignation. The people that I have met through one program or another in the past two years are wrestling with life decisions, while I am contemplating, though not very seriously, post-graduate qualifications. I like academia, but really, it's time to get a 'real' job.

I am very busy. I have all the stresses that you put upon yourself when you are in your mid-twenties and have the whole world to conquer. But I am happy. I have been crying a lot in the past week, but I am happy.

So, yes ...