a cure-all in chocolate

There is this dull well of black, somewhere in my chest.

Waiting is the last thing I want to do right now, but I promised myself that I will wait, and that is what I will do. I promised.

Meawhile I smile prettily at the world. I can even manage coherent discussions about work schedules, feral kids with grubby fingers and the avian flu.

No-one watching me should ever guess that I'm eating chocolate in an attempt to disguise that well. All they should see is the bar of hazelnut chocolate on my desk, because doesn't every girl have a weakness for chocolate?

Chocolate helps me prepare for the worst, and it will deaden most of the pain, when .. if .. it comes. Chocolate will help hide the despair, and help me fool myself into thinking it doesn't really matter, I don't really care. Chocolate will help me deny the emotions and help me not feel.

Chocolate - it is good.